Disparity

I get very annoyed, no, I get very angry about people who seem to think their life is so fucking awful they can’t cope with the day to day rigours the rest of us seem to have to cope with. 

Recently my Twitter feed has been full of a lot of wank, workfare, depressed souls and self serving disability. 

Let me tackle the workfare thing firstly. I was out of work for nearly two years, without this kick up the arse I’d still be claiming the dole.

Let me explain, when you lose your job you have the inclination to take a few weeks off. Let’s face it, you’ve been working hard, you deserve a week down the pub, a week with your feet up, a week wanking, a week scratching your arse, and before you know it you have reached the realms of the unemployable. Easily sorted you might think, I’m an intelligent bloke, I can get a job anywhere… No

You end up depressed, trying to explain yourself to a cunt who is on basic wage who has a quota to reach to reduce the benefits the tax payer pays. In my case I ended up with £40 a week with a deficit of £30 a month on my rent. Left me with roughly £130 a month to live on. I was disgruntled to say the least, I wanted more help, I got nothing. 

Workfare came along, an extra £20 in my pocket and my expenses paid, free welfare packs, which consisted of toiletries that were sorely needed, and a fund that provided me with money to buy a suit so I could look smart during my next interview, it’s very far away from what is being reported. 

We hear of the Tesco disaster, one tiny mistake in wording after putting up with a massive pile of wankers who didn’t want to work to begin with? Trust me, all the people on the course that I was on had no intention of working, didn’t even have the aptitude to work even if given a punch in the head. ‘I want to be an artist’, ‘I want to be a mortician’ , ‘I want to be a cock sucking whore’. but offered a job in McDonald’s they say it’s below them. 

What I have learned after my hiatus from the working world, earning £30k a year isn’t a gimme, you have to work for it. I worked for it before, I have no idea why I forgot my place. Cleaning toilets isn’t above you, serving beer isn’t above you, get your arse into gear, the world doesn’t owe you anything, you owe the world. 

Depression is also tackled in the same way, I have found that having self worth negates all negative effects that the dog tries to throw at you. Bite back, be yourself, fuck the world. Being you will undoubtedly find you more sex and three orgasms a week gives you a 50% less chance of dying of a heart attack. Live for now, not for yesterday.