Safety

Health and Safety is giving me a headache.

In my personal opinion health and safety is an unnecessary piece of twaddle. Surely Darwinism will eventually whittle out the need for such legislation, after all, why do we want someone who fails to realise that you have to be careful climbing a ladder working with you? Best they fall off quickly and end their miserable lives and stop bothering the rest of us.

The reason this subject is giving me a headache is because I have to muddle together something for work and to be honest it’s slightly annoying having to think of every daft thing someone might do. It’s almost like being a computer programmer, you have to think of every eventuality a knobtard might do and write a script that points out what a dick that person is. No wonder operating systems are so bloated.

Frankly the language used for such documents is almost as unreadable as braille to me, I just want to scream at the thickos its aimed at. Then again, using words of more than one syllable would be lost on the fools, so everything I have written will need to be carefully explained, much like talking to a four year old.

Remember people, hot things are hot, electrical sockets are not where you stick pens, driving your car off a cliff will not miraculously make it sprout wings so you can fly to the moon.

Maybe we should concentrate on teaching common sense in our schools instead.