An End

My headphones are dying.

I’ve had them for 22 years, longer than any relationship in my life, longer than I’ve lived in any house throughout my life. They have followed me everywhere, they are as much part of me as my right hand. *I’m a left hand masturbator by the way, the advent of the mouse has probably made the majority of males ambidextrous.. Thanks Bernard-Lee!*

I bought them from a side shop in Porthmadog, a bloke who specialised in fixing tv’s. I walked in there not knowing a thing about anything, I said, “I want to buy the best headphones you have, what can you show me, price no option!”

In fairness, I don’t think he took me seriously to begin with. I may have been sixteen but I worked very hard, I had cold hard cash and wasn’t afraid to spend it either.

We tried a few models which he thought were to my price level, I wasn’t impressed.

I got fucked off and said I was going, then he brought out the Philips, ‘Try these’ he said. ‘They’re £22 though, I don’t think your budget will stretch that far.’ 

No, it didn’t, that was two weeks wages for me back then. Yup, I am slightly older than you think.

I had twenty quid on me, I was fresh and cock-sure back then, the world hadn’t beaten me down, so I haggled, and fuck me! He agreed! I purchased a pair of Philips HP100’s.

22 years later, I am still listening with them. I have listened to twenty two years of mostly shit music but also some groundbreaking tunes. 

Sadly, there is now a crackle and the right-hand can is cutting out. All down to a loose connection I expect, but they are closed cans, to open them will break them. 

An end to an era of listening to music as it was meant to be listened to from the age of my youth. I’m slightly scared that the clinical clarity of new phones will show up the defects in my music collection, I was comfortable with my phones, I loved them… :/